so so tired

I'm almost waiting for the other ball to drop. How is Senator so perfect for me? He really is amazing. Of course, I'm being swept up into the world of romance, but seriously.



Warning: this might be a little TMI. if you don't want to read it, skip ahead.



he spent the night last night in my room. This is the second time this has happened and for the first time ever, i felt like it was fun, not wrong/dirty. I've had sleepovers with boyfriends and I always end up feeling dirty and/or used. but he has the perfect size chest, nice long arms that make me feel small(er), and is the biggest cuddler of anyone i know. Imagine a friendly cuddly cat. that's senator. we spent all night cuddling and being romantic, and at one point when we both woke up (it happened several times) we talked and talked and talked. We talked about MARRIAGE. and it was fun. we've both agreed not to have sex until we are married, so that's nice that we're on the same page. but the running joke all night was that we should go to vegas because we want to make love. it's silly, but fun and cute. towards the time we had to get up, he crossed a line (a fun line, but a line i didnt want to cross just yet) and again, instead of feeling horribly awkward and uncomfortable and dirty, i felt okay. we TALK about sex. which is way nicer than pretending to avoid talking about it. it got hot and heavy there for awhile and then the alarm kept going off and we overslept. he got up to take a shower and i fell back asleep. he woke me up awhile later and laid down and said something along the lines of, "i'm sorry i crossed that line, and i hope you're not uncomfortable or anything, thank you for keeping us in check and doing the right thing for both of us. later when you get home from babysitting, lets take a walk around the neighborhood and hold hands"



HOW FREAKING SWEET IS THAT. and what guy apologizes for crossing that line and then wants to take a walk around the neighborhood holding hands? it's so cute. so so cute.



i can see myself with him for my whole life. my whole entire life. i can see us getting married and having kids, and having lots and lots of sex. and loving each other wholly and completely. (not in that order, lol). how did i end up with someone so perfect?



there's this episode of grey's anatamy where callie and george get married in vegas. they come back and announce it to everyone really excitedly, only to find that everyone is kind of laughing at them slash looking at them like they're crazy. Callie says something along the lines of, "i want to go back to our vegas bubble and have room service and privacy and no wierd judgy friends" and i can kind of relate to her.



the "in a relationship" function on facebook and myspace both kind of freak me out. and we haven't changed either yet. but he did change his profile picture, which says a lot because a. he hardly ever changes it (i'm talking facebook) and all his pictures are just of him, nobody else in the picture (at least, no girls).



I'm smitten. what can i say?